Flood, Sweat & Tears/Transcript

Sprig: (pops out from the ground) Nice swing!

Anne: I was on varsity.

Sprig: I have no idea what that means.

(Both makes their own handshake, then laughing)

Wally: (playing concertina) A frog child and a monster from the woods getting along? So unnatural (plays unusual note)

Anne: Pssh! Of course we get along. We're Sprig and Anne.

Sprig: Anne and Sprig.

Anne and Sprig: Spranne against the world!

Wally: Disgusting. (keeps playing concertina)

(Suddenly Hop Pop screams from inside the house)

Anne: Was that Hop Pop?

Sprig: Sounds like he's in trouble. We're coming, Hop Pop! (they run into the house, then into Anne's room) Hop Pop! Hop Pop!

Anne: Whoa! What happened in here? (it's revealed the whole room floods)

Sprig: Hop Pop?

Hop Pop: (screaming) Stay back! Darned burrow bugs must have chewed the water pipes!

Anne: My room! My stuff!

Hop Pop: (put Anne's bag on the stair) Don't worry, Anne. I saved your stuff. Except your bed. And your blankets. And your pillow, pencils, T-shirts, hairbrush.

Anne: Just how long till it's fixed?

Hop Pop: Well, gotta find the leak, then patch it up good.

Sprig: Oh, let me help!

Hop Pop: Oh, no, ya don't! This here's river water. No tellin' what creepy critters are swimmin' around. (a river lamprey reveals its eyes above water then swims again)

Anne: Uh, so where am I gonna sleep?

Hop Pop: Well, the living room ain't no palace, but the couch is comfy.

Sprig: Uh, hello. (swings his tongue to Anne) Anne can bunk with me in my room. How fun will that be?

Anne: Roommates? Heck yeah! (they bump each other)

Hop Pop: I don't know. Bein' friends is one thing, but roommates? Ya think ya know someone until they're in your space and you're in theirs, and ya can't stand how they whistle all the time, and they complain whenever ya clean your web crusties out. (yelling) "Yes, I have to do it in our room! It has the best lighting!" (back to normal) My point is-- (seeing Anne and Sprig have already left) And they're gone. Mark my words though. No good will come of this. No good at all. (sinks into the water)

(Sprig opens the door to his room)

Sprig: Here we have it.

Anne: Whoa. (seeing Sprig patting her pillow) Awesome digs, Sprig.

Sprig: Thanks. I'll give you the grand tour. Let's start with the crown jewels.

Anne: Oh, cool. A doll collection.

Sprig: (chuckles) No. These are my action figures of the Great Battle of--

Anne: Incoming! (hit Sprig with a pillow) Oh, sorry, dude.

Sprig: What was that?

Anne: What? Haven't you ever had a pillow fight before--

Sprig: (hit Anne back) Heads up!

Anne: Oh, it's on!

(The two then have a fun pillow fight)

Sprig: It's fun 'cause it doesn't hurt! (being hit) Ow! (he swings the pillow and almost drops one of his action figures) Oops! Just gonna move General Bogbreath safely over here.

Anne: Yeah, gotta keep that doll out of harms way-- (being hit in the stomach) Ooh!

Sprig: Time in! (the fight continues)

(Cut to their sleep time. Night 1 begins)

Anne: So, Sprig, would you rather sweat melted cheese or always smell like skunk?

Sprig: Uh, sweat melted cheese. Frogs don't sweat, so I'd be cheese-free.

Anne: Frogs don't sweat? Uh, jealous! Okay, next question. Sprig? (spots Sprig sleeping) Psst! Sprig? Sprig? Sprig? Sprig, Sprig, Sprig. Hey, Sprig!

(throws a pillow at him) You awake?

Sprig: Oh, yeah, totally.

Anne: Okay, good. So, next question.

(In midnight, Anne starts to sweat)

Anne: Mm! Uh! Melting. (she opens the windows and the wind blows in) Ah, better.

Sprig: (felling cold) Uh, freezing. (he closes the windows then goes back to sleep)

(Anne spots that and glares at him)

(Next morning at the Plantar's house)

Hop Pop: Rise and shine, sleepyheads! Ya missed breakfast!

Anne: (facing upsidedown, groaning) Go away.

Polly: (pumps onto Sprig and wakes him up) First time I've ever seen you sleep in so late. What gives?

Sprig: I froze solid in the night and finally just thawed. (unfreeze himself)

Anne: What? It was like a swamp sauna in here. Maybe Sprig just needs another blanket.

Sprig: Or maybe Anne needs fewer blankets.

Anne: Or maybe...

Hop Pop: Y'know, the couch is still free in case there's trouble in paradise.

Sprig: No way. Pssh. It's no trouble.

Anne: Yeah. We're the best roommates in the history of roommates.

Anne and Sprig: Spranne against the world!

Sprig: After you, best roomie.

Anne: (gets out the room first) Why, thank you, also best roomie.

Hop Pop: (doubtfully) Hmm.

Polly: They're gonna eat each other alive.

Hop Pop: Oh, absolutely.

(Night 2)

(Anne turns on the light, reads a book and eats snack loudly)

(Sprig faces the wall and uses a pillow to cover his ear)

(Night 3)

(Sprig sleeps while croaking)

(The noise wakes Anne up. Then Sprig swings his tounge to her place)

(Night 4)

(Anne and Sprig take turn to open and close a window)

(Night 5)

(Anne turns on the light and Sprig growls)

(Night 6)

(Sprig throws his wet towel on Anne. She then sees him cleaning his web crusties and feels disgusting)

(Night 10)

(Anne picks up her clothes but steps on a rollerskae and falls. The rollerskate hits the wall and almost drop Sprig's action figure until he catches it. They look each other and laugh awkwardly)

Anne: Is that my shirt?

(At Anne's room, Hop Pop is still looking for the leak)

Sprig: (opens the back doors) Hey, Hop Pop. How much longer, ya think? Tonight?

Hop Pop: Not a chance.

Sprig: Oh, let me help, let me help! You know my underwater sight is better than yours. (tests his eyes) Eh? Eh?

Hop Pop: That's a bunch of malarkey! My eyesight's fine! (pauses) Who's that, Sprig? Anyway, don't you have chores to do?

(Sprig groans and goes away)

Anne: (opens the main doors) Hey, Hop Pop, what's the ETA on things down here? Not that I'm in a hurry to move back in or whatever. (Hop Pop glares at her) What? I'm just curious. A girl can't ask about her flooded makeshift bedroom without getting grilled? Sheesh.

(Both grunts)

Sprig: (scoffs and yawns) Wow, what a long day. Goin' straight to bed, if I, uh, can get there without tripping over all these dirty clothes.

Anne: I think it's your wet towels on the ground that'll get in your way.

Sprig: (muttering) I can leave my towels on the floor of my room.

Anne: What was that?

Sprig: Oh, nothing, best roomie. Anyways, good night. (goes to sleep)

Anne: Hmph. (she looks through at her photos with Sprig and chuckles at each of them) Oh. Hey, Sprig, would you rather have a splinter you could never get out or get bit by a giant mosquito once a day forever?

(Sprig grunts and shrugs. Anne then grabs a pillow and comes to Sprig)

Anne: Hey, Sprig.

Sprig: What, Anne?

Anne: (excitedly) Pillow fight!

Sprig: No, wait, stop! Aaah! (he dodges but accidentally hits his action figure and breaks it apart)

Anne: Oh, no! Y-Your doll-- Uh, I mean, action figure. (pauses) Spranne against the world. Right?

Sprig: (replying blankly) I have to go to the bathroom. (exits the room while staring at his friend)

Anne: (sighs, then complains) How is it still so hot in here?

(Sprig enters the flooded room and goes underwater)

Sprig: Where's that darn leak? Come on! Come on!

(Anne enters the room and sinks underwater as well)

(Both come out and take their breath)

Anne: Oh, that leak has got to be around here somewhere.

Sprig: I know, right?

(Both gasp)

Sprig: What are you doing here?

Anne: I was, uh, uh, feeling like a nighttime swim. What are you doing here?

Sprig: Nighttime swim. As well.

Anne and Sprig: (blaming) You came down here to fix the leak! Yeah, well, so did you!

Sprig: I knew it! You just couldn't wait to move out!

Anne: And you just couldn't wait to get rid of me! If you wanted me gone, you should have just said so-- Aah! (being dragged down by a river lamprey)

Sprig: (worriedly) Anne? Anne! Anne! Anne! Anne!

Anne: Something's got my leg!

Sprig: Hang on. I'm coming. (being dragged as well)

Anne: Sprig!

(They are being caught underwater. Anne pushes a lamprey on a ladder and sets herself free. Sprig hits on another's eyes and swims above. Later, they're surrounded by two lampreys)

Sprig: River lampreys! What are we gonna do?

Anne: They're too fast. We can't fight them underwater. (sees her wet blanker and pillows floating) Huh. Hey, Sprig. You set 'em up... (takes a pillow and gives Sprig one)

Sprig: You knock 'em down. (he swims into the water and distracts two fishes)

(He hits one to above water and Anne hits it)

(The two fishes then makes a spinning attack)

Anne: Come on. Come on. (she sees two fishes above water. Anne jumps on the bed and hits them) Backhand! (The lampreys hit the wall) Had enough, river losers?

Sprig: There's more where that came from.

(The lampreys sink underwater and dig a big hole at the bottom and suck all the water out)

Hop Pop: What the heck's going on down here?

Polly: Some of us are (screaming) trying to sleep!

(Sprig and Anne defend themselves, only realize it is Hop Pop and Polly)

Anne: Oh, uh, hi, Hop Pop.

Hop Pop: So roommate thing didn't work out, huh?

Anne and Sprig: (sighed) Not really.

Anne: I just couldn't live with him! The wet towels, the heat, the humidity. The web crusties. (feels disgusting)

Sprig: The loud snacking. The freezing cold. Lights on at all hours. Guess Spranne really is a bust.

Anne: Yeah.

Hop Pop: Why? Because you're finally talking? Sharing a room doesn't make you friends. Being honest with each other does.In fact, if you ask me, you're better friends now than you were before.

(Anne and Sprig smile)

Sprig: Of course we are!

Anne: Yes! Spranne is back and better than before!

(Both makes their own handshake, then laughing again)

Polly: Aw, how sweet. So where's Anne gonna sleep then? Not with me. My bucket's for one.

(Cuts to the couch in the living room, where Anne can open the windows and sleep comfortably)

Sprig: Here you go. Some super-loud snacks you can munch on.

Anne: Aw, thanks, Sprig.

Sprig: No problem. Anything else I can get ya?

Anne: All good. See you in the a.m.

Sprig: Okay. Good night.

(Anne finally can eat snacks and read a book on her own. But the quiet atmosphere with only the ticking clock noise makes her feel a bit lonely. She sighs, then sees a can with a spring connected to it)

Sprig: (on the speaker) So, Anne, would you rather smell like rotten eggs or have hiccups every day for the rest of your life?

Anne: Oh, good one. I think I'd... (the living room floods) Didn't anyone fix the leak?