Bizarre Bazaar/Transcript

Well, that was a waste of time.

Ugh, you said it.

Can't believe there was nothing in the archives about my music box.

[both] Wow.

So, you really think this is your key to getting home?

Well, it zapped me here, so, yeah. It's pretty much my only lead.

Really looking forward to finding someone who can help me fix this thing.

Bleh!

Don't worry, Anne. We'll figure it out eventually.

[Bessie screeching] Whoa!

Hey, get outta the way, you... Whatever the heck you are.

Hmm.

Oh, hey. What's that?

Man, these things are cute.

[chirping] Aw.

Sprig! Sprig! Hmm?

[Anne] Don't put your hand in there. Whoa!

Guys, look what I found. I think it's an entry ticket for the Bizarre Bazaar.

-The what now? -The Bizarre Bazaar.

I've never been, but I've heard stories.

It's a mysterious night market that passes through once a year.

Exotic foods, games, mysterious treasures.

Really? Maybe someone there will know how my music box works.

Hold up! From what I've heard, that bazaar is full of greedy degenerates.

Wave that thing around, and it'll get stolen for sure.

Tell you what. I'll reach out to some frogs I know

and see if they know a thing about your music chest.

Box. That, too.

[sighs] All right, fine.

Finally. Let's go.

Hyah! Hyah!

We're going to the Bizarre Bazaar tonight, aren't we?

Obvi.

[snoring]

[snickering]

Yeah-uh!

Bizarre Bazaar, here we come.

-Okay, which way? -I don't know.

I think the egg is supposed to show us.

Whoops. Dude!

[gasps] After it!

[panting]

It got away.

[gasps] There it goes!

No! We were so close.

[gasps] Huh?

[gasps]

Whoa. Whoa.

Whoa. Whoa.

[music playing]

Skins and pelts, skins and pelts.

[buzzing]

[squeals]

Whoa. Wow.

Hop Pop was right. This place is intense.

Hey, watch it, string bean. Oh, sorry.

Hey, look!

Check it out. Those look like the markings on my music box.

Suspiciously so.

Where's the vendor?

[groans] Are you kidding me? [sighs]

Hey, hey. It's fine. They'll be back.

And in the meantime,

might as well check out the rest of the bazaar.

[laughing] Okay.

But we gotta come right back here.

I don't wanna mess this up.

Two, please.

[sizzling] Ooh! Hot, hot.

Here you go, Anne.

Hey, this actually looks pretty good.

Ugh! Or not.

[chirping]

Ooh!

Yes! I win! Now I can buy my house back. Hooray!

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

[slurps] Ah!

Whoa!

Wow. It's amazing how far removed this place is from Wartwood.

There's absolutely nothing familiar here.

Oh, hey, there's Wally.

Come on. Wally needs a new pair of shoes.

Whoo-hoo!

What? This is larceny! I want my money back!

[gasps] You know the rules.

No refunds at the Bizarre Bazaar.

You're coming with us.

Ah! Get your hands off me. Help!

-Hmm. Hmm. -[Sprig] Mmm, mmm.

[munching] Mmm.

[gasps] Finally!

[groans]

[Romanian accent] Now where did I put my incense burner?

Huh?

Ah, velcome. Velcome to Valeriana's Antiques.

[murmuring] Anne, I think she's missing an arm.

I heard that. Oh! [laughs] Hey. What is this thing?

Just one of my many treasures collected from my years of travel.

[both] Whoa!

I've seen and heard it all.

[squawks] Seen it all. Heard it all.

Betcha haven't seen anything like me, though.

No, not exactly.

Uh, there's something I'd like you to take a look at.

Uh, you sure about this? Maybe Hop Pop was right.

You heard her. She's seen it all.

If anyone knows anything about the music box--

My backpack! Where'd it go?

[cackles]

Hey! That's my backpack, you little creep.

Get back here!

Could it be, Leander?

Could she be the one we've been searching for?

[squawks, coughs]

No, Leander! Not on the carpet.

Stop that tiny thief! [panting]

[panting]

[gulps] Greetings.

Come to try your luck at my fun and exciting game?

Absolutely not! Give me my backpack.

Backpack?

The one on your prize wall!

Oh, you mean the magical pouch of mystery.

Who can say where it came from? Or how?

Nice try.

Ha!

[grunts] What?

Ah-ah-ah!

Once something is on the prize wall,

the only way to get it back is to win it.

Sorry, hon, Bizarre Bazaar rules.

The music box. I can't lose it.

[gasps] What are we gonna do?

Looks like there's only one thing we can do.

All right, we'll play your game, you little sicko.

So what is it? Dunk tank? Whack-a-mole?

Whack-a-tank-a-dunk-a-mole?

[chuckles] Oh, it's a little more involved than that.

Behold!

That's right, folks. Thrills! Chills! Spills!

The best cockroach racing this bazaar has to offer!

[cheering] Whoo! Yeah!

Giant cockroaches. Of course.

Now, then. Who has the guts to challenge

this strange-looking biped and her little pink boyfriend?

Whoa! Not my boyfriend.

Yeah, she's way too old for me.

Yeah. Wait, what?

[deep voice] I will take this challenge.

[all gasp]

The Wrecker! [gasps]

He hasn't been seen in years.

The Wrecker? The legend says he'll wreck yourself

if you don't check yourself.

Let's get outta here.

Oh, boy.

All right. Let's do this.

The race is on! [bell clangs]

-[horn tooting] -[revving]

On your marks.

[revving] Get set.

Go!

I've got 20 on The Wrecker. I've got 25.

I've got a rash.

[groaning]

Hey! That's cheating!

[all] Anything goes in the Bizaare Bazaar.

-[laughing] -Oh, no. They have signs.

It must be true!

Oh, anything goes, huh? Well, then I have a plan.

All right, Sprig. Tongue him.

Tongue him? I hardly know him.

Just do it, please!

Whoa!

Whoo-hoo! Oh, cool, it worked.

Huh?

[menacing laugh]

-[squeaks] -[grunts]

[both] We're gonna win! We're gonna win! We're gonna win!

[cheering]

[horn toots] Winner, winner, cricket dinner!

-[both coughing] -Well, that didn't feel balanced.

Our reigning champion takes the prize.

No!

Here you are.

You look fantastic.

No, no, no, no, no. Wait! Come back!

[gong clangs]

Oh, no. The bazaar's closing.

-[gasping] -Look. Pack it up.

The music box.

I-It's gone.

Now I'll never get home.

Hey, it's okay, Anne.

Maybe, uh, we can find someone who knows The Wrecker.

Track him down, you know?

The frogs in there said they hadn't seen him in years.

No, he's long gone by now.

Hey! [both scream] The Wrecker!

Look, I know you won my backpack,

but there's something inside I really need.

You gotta give it back. I'll do anything.

Hop Pop? Hop Pop?

I'm so confused.

Isn't it obvious, Anne?

I knew you two couldn't resist the Bizarre Bazaar,

so I decided to keep watch in case you got yourselves in a pickle!

Which you did. A big, fat pickle.

Hmm?

Anyways, here you go.

[gasps] Hop Pop! You're the best.

Thanks for having my back... pack.

You were right. I was too impatient for answers.

[unzips]

Here. Go through your trusted channels.

I'm okay with waiting a little longer.

I'll do my best, Anne.

I know how important this is to you.

Okay, back up. You're The Wrecker, Hop Pop?

How many games have you beaten? Did it ever get dangerous, Hop Pop?

Have you killed a man, Hop Pop?

[laughs]

Whatever happens in the Bizarre Bazaar stays in the Bizarre Bazaar.

Aw, man!

[chuckles] Just like Vegas.

Sure, Anne. Just like Vegas.

[Anne] Good night, Sprig! Good night, Hop Pop!

[Sprig] Night, you guys. [Hop Pop] Night, kiddos.

Sorry, Anne, but I can't have you showing this thing around.

Too dangerous for all of us.

Now it's where it belongs. Where no one can find it.